reconciliation

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But while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. We are now justified by His blood, therefore we are saved by Him and from the wrath of God. For while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by His Life. More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ through whom we have now received reconciliation. Romans 5:8-11, ESV (emphasis mine)

So much goodness in the above scripture. None is righteous, so that not a single one of us can boast of any possible earning of the grace, over any other human being, that we have received in Christ Jesus. Yet, our human nature in it’s pride, loves to look down on others… at least I am not like that sinner! Remember the guy that was just forgiven of all of his debts? The Bible is clear, if we are now found in Christ Jesus, we were once considered enemies of God, and those who currently remain unbelievers are, as well. That one finger pointing at another has three more pointing at self. We know the fruit. It stinks and is rotten to the core. We can never earn this grace that we might brag that somehow we managed to get in good with God by our “good” behavior. No. No one is good. Sure, at one time when God created Man and Woman in the Garden of Eden, he said His work was very good. But, oh, how we fell. “None is righteous, no, not one;” (see Romans 3:9-20, NIV)… all have fallen short and the whole world is accountable to God. And grace is freely given, but only in Jesus Christ. And if we sit in judgment, believing another doesn’t deserve that same grace, we truly have missed the mark for the ground is 100% level at the foot of the cross. The only One who can condemn is Christ Himself. And until He returns and restores all things to Himself and His Kingdom reigns on earth as it is in Heaven, the Age of Grace is still here for anyone who understands their own bankruptcy and desperate enough to ask for it.

I have good news, “there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1, ESV Meaning, the One and only one who does have power and control over the destiny of our souls, God Himself, has provided a way for you to escape the curse from the Garden, the curse of sin and death.

So what do we do about sin and how do we seek forgiveness? We look inward at our own heart (not anyone else’s) and we hold it before the only example of righteousness who came down from Heaven and walked this earth as a human, Jesus Christ, God Himself. We see our heart in it’s own inherently wicked ways. We realize that there is nothing we can do to erase our sin. Sin leads to death. But we know One who can blot out our transgressions and give us life. We come as we are. We stop in our tracks. We repent. If you see it, the Holy Spirit has convicted you of it. God has sought you out and drawn you to Himself. We agree with God that we have sinned and fallen short of His glory. We ask His forgiveness, are reconciled and we turn 180 degrees and go the other direction away from our sin. God gave His son to die for us for this very moment. And this gift of Jesus’ blood which was shed on the cross for us, it is for everyone. Even the worst of sinners. Even …our enemies. The Apostle Paul referenced himself, a Pharisee of Pharisees, the most righteous of righteous – and the chiefest of sinners: those who say their cup is clean on the outside, but yet filthy on the inside. Jesus called out the wickedness of the Pharisees all the time during his years of ministry. All of us are Pharisees at some point. Thankfully, no earthly human gets to decide who receives this forgiveness, reconciliation, and restoration, even though some try. It’s already been decided and paid in full by God. And He has made it available to ALL of us at a great cost. It was freely given to us when we didn’t deserve it. While all are welcome to receive it, not everyone will receive it. But let me ask you, will you receive it?

We must only look at our own hearts. Nowhere else. Our hearts are inherently sinful. Even those of us who have been saved still wrestle with sin and have to make a conscious decision every day whom we are going to serve. So not only is there our salvation, but then there is the working out of our salvation in our every day walk with Jesus. Have you been forgiven? The gift of Jesus and eternal salvation is here. It is waiting. Will you embrace it? “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved.” Romans 10:9, NIV All you have to do is confess your sin, and ask for Jesus to be Lord of your life. If you do, then you have indeed received reconciliation to God Himself. While this gift is free to you, it will cost you everything that you hold dear here on this earth. God will do the work on helping you clean up your heart. He will strip away whatever is between you and Him until He knows He has your undivided heart. A divided heart is a double-minded heart which Jesus called out in the Pharisees. Once God has your heart, He will ask you to do the same with others. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32, ESV

It’s the hardest thing ever to forgive someone who has hurt you. Especially if that person is unrepentant. Remember, “while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son.” Is this not the way of the cross? We need to allow His healing in our hearts when we have been wounded by others. We are even challenged with reconciliation with those who are truly repentant because God is a God of reconciliation and He is never divided against Himself. Never be reconciled with someone who is unrepentant, though. You will know if they are truly repentant by their fruit that they produce which takes time. Regardless of if they are repentant or not, we need to come to a place of forgiveness in our hearts. When we release that person who harmed us, we can be assured that God has not released that person until that person has answered to God for the offense committed. God will deal with the unrepentant person in His own way and He can do the judging way better than we can. It will be done in such a way that is undeniably going to get that person’s attention, whether that person even repents or not. Keep a discerning heart.

We are to keep the peace as much as it is possible within us. We search our heart. We let God search our heart. If there is to be a reconciliation it will happen, because our God is the God of reconciliation. Remember that the same Holy Spirit which lives in our heart also lives in the heart of the repentant person’s heart. From a biblical perspective in Galatians 6:1-5 it says of those who are repentant: that those who live by the Spirit (other Believers) are to gently restore the repentant Believer, even to carry one another’s burdens lest the one gently restoring falls into the same sin. This doesn’t necessarily mean that the one who has been harmed has to do the restoring. I think this scripture has to do more with the church in general and how to deal with a Believer who falls into sin. How to gently restore them back into the church. However, it is biblical that a repentant Believer be shown kindness and forgiveness and be restored into the flock. That person is forgiven by God and so we, too, are supposed to forgive. It lines up with other scripture that we go the extra step with restoration when a Christian is repentant. If we are judgmental of that repentant Believer, mean to them, gossip behind their back to others, exclude them, wish ill-will of them, payback to them what we think they deserve, well…we have just fallen into that bucket of sin, ourselves.

Forgiveness, restoration and reconciliation are foundational truths, authored by God Himself in Christ Jesus. You can never will it on your own. You will see this beautiful truth in other Believers as they live a life of surrender and abandon to Jesus. It is such a fine line of understanding and great wisdom. If you truly are a Believer in Jesus Christ then the Holy Spirit who lives in you, will enable you to let go of that bitterness of the suffered pain and help you to forgive. Remember, it is not for their sake that you forgive, although it may go a long ways in restoration if that person is genuinely repentant and has asked you for that forgiveness. But the forgiveness you give that person, in the space of your own heart and soul, is more for your sake. This is what God requires of you as a Christian. It is the dying to self and your own will: the taking up of your cross. He will show you what it will look like in practicality. Jesus said whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for His sake will find it. (See Matthew 16:24-25, ESV) The hardest thing you will ever do in life is to learn to let go of things in the world that are most important to you (love of ‘whatever’) and the things that are most painful (wounded-ness) which includes your will or “right” to seek vengeance or to hold a grudge against another person who has sinned against you or someone you love. It will only harm you to hold onto this unforgiveness, though, and cause bitterness to grow in your heart. It will grow like a weed and you will be miserable. Pull the weed quickly as soon as you notice it before it takes root. It is truly only God’s right to seek vengeance and justly serve condemnation on another. (See Hebrews 10:30) You can do it. I know you can. Surrender to God. Let it go. He will take care of it. We can be wrong, even when we know we are right.

There are many stories of people who choose to forgive, especially forgiving those who have willfully harmed another out of great evil. I think of Corrie ten Boom and her decision to forgive the Nazi guard who committed evil atrocities to both her and her sister Betsie at Ravensbrück Concentration Camp. They let their pain and suffering shape, persevere and grow their character. They understood the positional truth of their hope. It wasn’t a feeling. It was the hope of God’s love poured out into their hearts by the Holy Spirit (see Romans 5:2-5). Corrie and Betsie learned, “There is no pit so deep that God’s love is not deeper still,” and “God will give us the love to be able to forgive our enemies.” (see, Ten Boom Museum). Both lives poured out for forgiveness of others who were so undeserving, because they knew themselves, how much they were forgiven. Amazing. It is that love and that forgiveness that comes only from Christ Jesus. He is our perfect example. Why should we even call ourselves Christians if we don’t practice these very truths that we identify within our own hearts? When we choose not to hang on to bitterness and instead to forgive, we indeed are free.

Much has been required to those of us who have been forgiven. If we understand the cost of this forgiveness, we will remember, we too were once… an enemy of God. When we cherish this forgiveness that God shows us in our own lives, we will want that same grace and forgiveness for others. After all, it is only hurt people, who hurt people. As evil as sin can be and harms others, we don’t have to look further than the sin in our own hearts. We need to find it in ourselves to not only forgive others who are just as undeserving, but then to pray for them through the power of God’s Holy Spirit. We need to understand who the rightful author of that evil truly is. Where it comes from. It comes from Satan, the Father of lies and true Enemy of our souls. Don’t miss it. This is a spiritual battle, not a human one. “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Ephesians 6:12, NIV. When we forgive we disarm the influence Satan has in our lives and the forces of darkness.

We would be good to keep this front and center when we are tempted to ruminate about the ones who have hurt us. It will take us down a dark road. We have to remember that Jesus died for that person who harmed you, as well. Jesus said, “there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.” Luke 15:7, ESV Pray for their genuine repentance and salvation. The thief on the cross was evidence of this moment of rejoicing in all the Heavenlies and he didn’t even have a chance to live what we would call “the life of a godly Christian”. He must’ve done a ton of soul searching while he was hanging on that cross next to Jesus. Only Jesus could read his mind. Outwardly though, we only have record that he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom. And He (Jesus) said to him, “Truly I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.” Luke 23: 42-43, ESV The thief repented. Jesus saw his heart and He had mercy. I wonder what the person thought (the one who had been robbed by that thief) after those words were spoken? What a lesson. Both men on either side of Jesus had the positional truth of God’s forgiveness and reconciliation available to them. They were both “enemies of God”. The forgiveness was there for each one of them to recieve. They both chose. One received. The other did not. Only one entered into glory with Jesus. Jesus had the final word on both of their destinations and He still does today with us.

When we see others as God sees us, pride falls and gravity bears up humility at the core of our hearts, because of the cross. Only Christ is deserving. It is beautiful. See…. He truly makes all things new. He forgives, He restores, and He reconciles…even offering these up for His enemies. This is our God. It doesn’t have to make sense to us. We are so fortunate to be redeemed! Choose today. I am forever grateful for eternal salvation in Jesus Christ, for I was once an enemy.

“Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Luke 23:34, ESV

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Last week I had an enjoyable Skype interview with Joe Brookhouse of Frequency.FM to talk about my new Christmas single, A Still and Quiet Night. I like to think of the meaning of Christmas as being an outpouring of God’s heart and love to us by sending us His Son, Jesus, God incarnate: to reconcile us to Himself and to one another by showing us what it means to love one another well, while we are here on this earth.

Here is the link to the podcast, article and additional links. Please share it with as many people as you can! You just never know when someone really needs to hear something that will really touch them. We also thought we were just a little funny in the interview…you might chuckle once or twice. Maybe. 😉

Frequency-Banner Frequency.FM Amp’d Interview – Jen Haugland

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Can’t think of a better way to welcome in a release of a new album than to end Behind The Songs with Loved You Well! Releasing here on the West Coast on CD Baby in less than 15 minutes! Already released on iTunes!!! Woo hoo!

Track 10. Loved You Well

1. Craig & Jen Wedding Day 1987This was both a painful song to write and a liberating, healing song to write. Let me expound…

After 13 years of marriage (married August 1, 1987) and 3 children: 12, 9 & 3, we were divorced. A few months later saw us far away in the high desert of Colorado Springs, CO trying to see if we could put the pieces back together again. We had everything to gain and nothing to lose, since we had already lost everything. Let me say, that God’s grace is sufficient. He is a VERY BIG God and can do anything, including reconciling broken marriages, first by reconciling the two to Himself, and then to each other. Which is what God did for my husband and me.

It was the hardest thing we have ever done to allow Him to work in our hearts and to learn how to die to ourselves, removing any sense of entitlement of “it’s not fair”. Likewise, the cross wasn’t fair. But He (Christ Jesus), willingly laid down His life for us and then gloriously raised it back up again. It really is the hardest thing to lay down your life for another human being when you have been treated in a way that is poor. But in our instance it was mutual. We both were horrible at loving each other unconditionally. We had so much to learn about what Christ did at the cross for us. What true love meant. I learned in our counseling (it was quite the epiphany, although seems like a “no-brainer”), that the same God that died for me, also died for my husband and all his sins and failures.

A cloud of witnesses rejoiced along with our children and parents. We were re-married on August 16, 2000, making every wrong right, and our lives became sold out to Christ as a result. Our children made strong commitments to Christ and to purity, including our daughters who made vows to remain pure until marriage; they saved their first kiss for the altar with their husbands and greatly honored their father and me (their brother is following in their footsteps).

6. Restored Haugland Family 2000
Reconciled and re-married, August 16, 2000.

I realize that not every relationship can turn around and find a place of reconciliation like ours did. That is the reality of a fallen world. But God takes us where we are at, even when we fail and the other person gives up or we give up. Sometimes the damage is too great. It takes both partners to be willing to work through their pain and come back together again. This is what we chose, and our lives were never the same again, nor our children’s lives and we have no regrets when we have seen the outcomes.

On August 16, 2000 we re-married each other and it’s been another 13 and 1/2 years. It will be 27 years this August (we still count all the years), but the kids like to celebrate the first anniversary because then it means that they count. Craig and I like to celebrate the second one because it was the one we worked the hardest for. To simplify things, we celebrate from August 1 – August 16! 🙂

Here we are now, still plugging along. I’d like to say it get’s easier, sometimes it does, but other times, it gets just as challenging as we face milestones such as job changes, retirement, marrying off adult children and becoming empty nesters. Even stepping out in faith with this music ministry has been a great challenge to us. I know that the Enemy of God does not want to see us be successful for the Kingdom. So we dig our heels in a little deeper, cling on to our faith a bit tighter and try to trust Him through all the unknowns. He doesn’t guarantee that there will be no pain (in fact, He assures it) but He guarantees that He will never leave us and that He will carry us through the hard times…if we let Him.

What might it look like if we learned to love each other well? Not just our spouses, but even our family members, friends and then our enemies (those who are set against us). Will people that watch us, know that we are Christians because we choose to love each other well to the finish, or do we end up like those who have no hope? Where is our hope? Is our God big enough for us?

Finish well by loving well, if you are able…

Last - Haugland Family EP Release Party 2012
Haugland Family – Jen’s Your Love Comes After Me EP Release Party 2012

Loved You Well

©2013 Jen Haugland and Eric Copeland
Jen Haugland Music (ASCAP)/From The Moment Music (BMI)

V1
When I fail to hear you speak
And I grow tired when things look bleak
Too careless with words

Swallow pride and lay down my life
It’s such a painful sacrifice
But He said He was enough

Ch
If I loved you with a heart
Loved you with some grace
Loved you ‘til the end of days
What a finish
And loved you when it’s hard
Even with our scars
Because we’re both created
In His image

Then I’ll know I loved you well
Oh I’ll know I loved you well
Yeah I’ll know I loved you well
Oh I’ll know I loved you well

V2
There’s no guarantee we’ll last
As we struggle with the past
The lines have been drawn

I have bought the lie and found
There’s a truth that brings me ‘round
That He reconciles

Ch

Session Players
Mark Baldwin (guitar)
Gary Lunn (bass)
Eric Copeland (keys)
Brian Green (orchestration)

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(continued from “A Yielded Life-Part I“)…

Well, then I got out of bed… It really was a blessing of a day to get to record the vocals on my first EP. Matt was really gracious with me. But it also happened to be one of the hottest days for the Puget Sound area and even hotter in Matt’s Garaffice! It was upper 90’s in there. Between songs, Matt would turn on the air-conditioning to pump cool air into the studio, but then that dried out my voice more. I was definitely feeling like a fish downing the water!

My husband wanted me to take our “Mr. Burban” (fondly nicknamed by our son when he was a toddler because he couldn’t say Suburban… we joke about it and people wonder why we talk about hard liquor when we are going places). The Honda had been recently having some problems and Craig was pretty sure it would not make the trip. The suburban was much more reliable for what I needed this day, so I lugged the beast down there with the back of it loaded up with a case of water (little did I know that the case of water was going to be for more than drinking).

As I was leaving Matt’s house after finishing the recording, I stopped to fuel up at a local gas station. A gentleman who had just finished fueling stopped me and asked me how much I wanted for my suburban…point blank! I was dumbfounded…”uhh, uhhhh… I don’t know if it’s for sale…you’d have to talk to my husband.” He said okay and asked for my husband’s number. It was quite comical to watch this stranger call my husband and ask Craig to name his price for Mr. Burban as this guy knew it was hard to find this model of suburban in such great condition with no problems. Ha! Little did any of us know (are you curious yet?)! Well, needless to say, Craig wasn’t sure he was ready to sell it yet… shoot, it was still a baby at 15 years old (I’m joking)! So the guy left his contact info with us in case we changed our minds.

I started the long drive home through rush hour traffic and then as I got on to our Olympic Peninsula for the last 45 minute stretch…Mr. Burban wasn’t quite so peppy or happy anymore (dang, should have sold it while I had the chance). That red engine light came on after I got up the first hill and then that farenheit thingy on the dashboard went way over into the red…hmmm… I thought this might be a good idea to pull over. Fortunately, I was right at the turn-off to Port Townsend by a park and ride and was able to pull in to the side of the parking lot and look inconspicuous, while I figured out what on earth was going on with the Suburban. Surely, God, you knew it was a long day for me and that I was trying to get home in time for Craig and I to celebrate our anniversary…right? Inconspicuous? Nope… could this possibly have anything to do with yielding?…

(to be continued…)

 

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Meriam Webster defines “yielded” as: to reward, render as fitting, to give up a claim or possession on, to surrender, to cultivate, etc. (see: http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/yield)

Here are the many definitions of it in the Hebrew, Aramaic and Greek (basically it means the same thing): http://biblez.com/searchstrongs.php?q=Yield

Be sure to read up on these though, because this will be a longer blog series that I want to share with you. This first part will reflect a portion of a testimony and story that I am writing in a book that I hope will be another important part of my ministry here at Jen Haugland Music.

As I went about a particular day in my week (last week), I think I may have experienced most of these different meanings of the word. I certainly yielded to my early morning schedule. I had to drop off my son with his sister early in Seattle,  so I could get to the recording studio in time to lay down vocal tracks for my new EP starting at 10. That meant I had to leave the house by 5:15 to catch an early enough ferry (which I missed by the 4th car) and know my route to my daughter’s house (which I overshot by going a back way from downtown Seattle and ended up in a very wrong neighborhood of W. Seattle and consequently was late to my recording time).

But the morning had started off so good as I laid in bed, slowly waking up, reflecting in my mind these songs that I would be recording that day. They were worship songs and meditating on them, word by word, gave me solitude with my Heavenly Father.  I prayed that He would be glorified in every song that I sang so that the listener on the receiving end of this upcoming EP project would hear whatever message God would have for them.

Then I turned over and looked at my husband of 25 years next to me still sleeping and remembered whom I yielded my life to in marriage, twice! I thought about my God of second, third, fourth (etc.) chances. This day was our 12th wedding anniversary of when Craig and I re-married each other after being divorced for 6 months (and married for 13 years previous to each other). On August 16, 2000, I chose to be brave that day, when I was so scared. I had thought about running away, even at that last moment before walking into that courtroom to go before the Justice of the Peace. My step-mom, whom I had just confessed my fears to, who was by my side said, “I am so proud of you honey, you are so brave” and she held my hand. I never forgot her words.

As I stood outside of that courtroom I thought about that word “brave”.  I had no guarantee that life would be easier, or different from the previous 13 years that we struggled through, but then I heard a still small voice in my ear reminding me, that if I would yield, I had a guarantee that He would be with me every step of the way and carry me when I needed Him too.  I yielded my life to Christ and remembered how much He yielded His life to me and also to my husband who very much needed the same forgiveness that I needed.

Apparently there is something to being brave…

Yes, I trusted my God that day, I chose to be brave and yield to Him and His will in my life (as did Craig), and our God has been faithful… these last 12 years have been the best ever and we count even the 13 before as a blessing as well. Yielding has produced much fruit in our lives. We stood against the forces of darkness that day that longed to destroy us and our little family. We stood against the societal norms of our times and the ‘lie of divorce’ as we stood inside that little room and we confessed to love one another forever with the love that Christ had shown us.

That day, we were surrounded by our small cloud of witnesses here on earth: our 3 beautiful children: Jessica, Rachel & Nathanael, Craig’s dad and mom and my dad and step-mom. I know our Heavenly Father, our Savior, the Spirit and a cloud of witnesses in the heavens were also rejoicing! It is a day we all highly treasure as a family. It changed our hearts, it strengthened our faith and it gave a solid foundation and future to our children who now understand a deeper meaning of what and who love is in their own lives.  It has changed our lives forever in so many ways and we are so thankful for the cross!WeddingDay08162000-1

(to be continued, A Yielded Life-Part II)…